The Two Month “Susan Life Reflection” On Where We Should Go Now (While I am Drinking Cava)

It’s not that I havn’t wanted to talk to you.

It’s me – not you. We have a good thing: I dictate my thoughts through a keyboard, I pretend you are there, you giggle at me tripping over my own ideas, whisper “Isn’t she stupid and cute at the same time” to your partner/lover/one night stand/spouse/kitten, and slice a piece of that crumb cake, sitting on the counter, and tell me not to worry – start lifting that expensive barbell you bought (in a hyper sensitive moment) and all this Covid weight will melt away.

All that is a thing, right?

My challenges, beyond being an isolated and lonely girl, may not be as bad as yours. I still have my job, roof over my head, food in the fridge, a backyard I can play in, and money to pay the bills. I am usually the person with NONE OF THESE THINGS crying on the bathroom floor. So why am I back and in a positive condition? (fleeting, trust me, but today is a good day) Completely for selfish reasons: to sell some wine (yeah, admitting is letting go), to show you another side of the wine coin, to share my screw ups and successes, and to remember that I got some good stuff in my head that you may like to hear.


Here is the : Two Month Susan Reflection On Where Life Should Go Now:

  • Read my ass off, and grasp more wine related substance. I’ve been learning from a super smart wine guy the last two months, and I am just over the moon with his education; self taught, experienced, witty, detailed to the last drop in the glass. I want my song to be loud, accurate, and thundering with thought provoking conversation between us, and I know I can up my game.
  • I tried the LIVE Instagram thing. Honestly, it’s weird, and now it’s a saturated platform. Are we really having a conversation about wine, or am I just drinking to drink? It became very empty. What about a podcast? Thoughts? That sounds like fun…
  • Take more pictures. If you spend any time with me, you are now flipping me off. I already take pictures of wine, wine people, wine stacks, wine ideas, wine dinners, more wine…. enough with the wine. I have recently been looking at pictures, and erasing ones that have no relevance to my life now. However, there are memories that come flooding back, tears and laughter that I can touch, and wonderful people and places that remain in my soul. You just need a little nudge with a visual.
  • Reflect on what has happened, absorb what is happening now, acknowledge when someone does you wrong, walk away from that wrong without feeling wrong, find the delight in not being the star (back up dancers build the brand-you remember that hot one third from the right), assemble your team with different energies, evolve, know that a moment can just be a moment, and that a bad thing is just someone else’s idea of “bad” – not yours. This last year has taught me that people that have never met you before can appreciate you and grow to respect you. At the same time, people you have known for years can make you numb OR continue to fight in your army with a crazy vengeance.
  • And watch a movie with John Cusack; I suggest Better Off Dead (a 1985 classic).

All of that is really good shit.

But what you really want to know is what have I been drinking.

The first month of isolation; a whole lot of wine. Man, I became a very round lady. What a bloated mess. That had to stop friends; and it did. But you know, your girl likes her wine. A few new things needed to enter this picture; something lower in alcohol, quaffable, easy on the liver, and satisfying after a week not having ANY alcohol to drink. I’ve always liked a bubble; Champagne, Cava, Prosecco (eh, not as much but it will do), Brachetto – anything with a little spritz and I’m ready. I PURCHASED (you heard me) a case of Cava and was instantly hooked. Here is why:

  • 11.5 percent alcohol. That made much more sense.
  • Cava is from Penedes; one of the most important viticultural areas of Catalonia in Spain. I sell wines from Spain. Support yourself woman.
  • The grapes: Macabeo, Parellada, Xarello; Macabeo being the dominant in this blend. This grape is so elegant, has complexity, shows pretty acidity, and has the bang of fruit needed without being obnoxious.
  • There is a Brut, there is a Rose, and I know you are going to want to rock this as a mimosa – how about you DON’T! This wine is perfect without all the additional crap you want to feed it. Sure it’s your brunch wine, your after work out wine (don’t judge), a “Is it time to drink in a pandemic” wine (if you have to ask…) – all are acurate.
  • Bubbles make you happy, they just do.
  • This wine’s name? Los Dos Cava – Brut or Rose – affordable goodness; can’t leave that part out, by the way. Grab a bottle, send me a picture of what you are drinking and how you are drinking it, or send me a new suggestion! Anything with a sparkle!

Consciousness Found In A Bubble

Last week I lost awareness.

Sure of myself, a little cocky, knew things would go “my way”, judge mental of my past, hungry for the next step, and not filtering what I said or did.

It bothers me when I need to begin a statement with “Do you know how good I am?”.  Truth; if you need to say that, the person you are speaking to is probably aware. I’ve also worked way to long and hard on myself, my skill, my business, my wardrobe – obvious I’ve arrived at the table. So, now, how do I shimmy through the crack between success and “you are not what we need at this time” situations.

Here is the issue – sometimes you just know. Sometimes you can not only recognize but feel your superiority. Be obnoxious and admit this, because damn it, you have struggled hard not to be just another shallow wine girl.  My problem was that I grabbed that feeling, but forgot to notice the edges. When I say the edges, in wine and in my life situations, I mean the flavors and  perceptions that are secondary, but more than meaningful. I insulted when not meaning to, I slacked off when I should have been more reactive, and my filter mechanism faulted.

Then last night, while cuddling with Karma, I was told that I missed a “tradition”.  A friend and I always begin a meal with a glass of some kind of champagne – I happen to have missed the dinner I promised I would attend. You may not think this is a “thing”, but the thought of this being a special something was of total comfort to me. It’s like it became an obvious secret, or an indisputable action just known between two people. Coming into the holidays, and always feeling alone at this time, what a great reminder that culture doesn’t need to be created in a room full of people.

A favorite bubble? God, so many. Here is an easy one:

  • The Wine: Moet and Chandon, Rose Imperial
  • The Grape: Pinot Noir, Pinot Meunier, and Chardonnay; classic line up for a perfect champagne.  Each grape will bring it’s own character to the blend. Now, to make the wine pink, we can go about this in two ways. We can blend the two red grapes (Pinot Noir and Pinot Meunier) to the white one – makes sense, right?  Or we can do something called the saignee method; you may also hear “bleeding” of the juice (translation). With the saignee method, you will be stealing a portion of the red wine juice after it has been in contact with skins and seeds. Basically, something red wine making is leaving behind. That portion of juice is then left to ferment on its own. The result? Better aromas and flavors, better concentration.
  • Is this a yes or no; Big yes. Friends in the wine industry may poo poo the simpleness of Moet, and I can agree at some level. But don’t be mad at this wine; it does more than the job and just can make you happy. And who doesn’t want that.
  • What do you do with it: I always would ask my students this question to get them to think deeper. Ok, we like the wine, but there is more to the wine’s life other than our simple consumption. The BEST and I mean BEST thing about bubbles is that you can drink them with ANYTHING. That is a broad statement; maybe not Mama’s lasagna, or a pot of sausage and peppers – I can think of better. But alone, with cheese, paired with fish, flan for dessert, spicy Thai food, BBQ, watching the sun set; should I go on?  There is versatility where you presume there shouldn’t be – I love that statement so much.

If we have a relationship, I will make a mistake. You will make a mistake. There will be things we should have talked about, and probably will choose to forget. I’m holding on to the reminders that we are not malicious people, and have found each other for a reason. When I disappointed a ex-coworker last week, she told me she knew I had a “good heart”.  So, even in my haste of creating a non reality situation for myself, she saw the acceptable. Remember this moment.